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Barry Nicholas
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Sunday, May 04, 2008, 10:55 PM
Even though i know no one is gonna read this post, im going to write what i need to here. Its like a journal for me, where mistakes, happiness, and all those tears gather. And basically cos i find it rather gay to go cry on someone's shoulder. Even though they said its okay and there's nth wrong. Life has so many lessons to learn, and the hardest ones are always the ones that have to do with yourselves. Even in relationship situations the one getting over the break up has to be you, not u or your dad even if the cause was ur dear love, or whatsoever. Many times throughout my years that i begun to look at my surroundings and understand i've always said i wish to forget the past. Be it sad or happy, i admit i've cried non stop over a girl. Like everytime i shoot myself in the back again. Man cry not for themselves but for their comrades. We dont cry cause we got a cut, we dont cry when we fall down and feel pain, heck not even we get knocked down by a car. But notice this, break ups, kin-ship mishaps, classmate meeting with accident and passes away, aren't these the only times u see a real* guy cry, ill explain the star later. Things that have to do with people around us are the only ones that hurt us inside. Maybe its the way we are built, and neither am i saying guys are superior to girls. What im saying is that when u see a girl cry and think of the reasons its going to be alot different from when u really see a guy cry and ask what happened. Probably none of you see where im going with, 1. either cause no one read this, 2. you totally catch no balls. But i thought i was a forgiving person, whats past is past, i really try to look at it that way but right now what hurts is inside and nth i do can make it feel better. To scream it out and knock something out cold would do very little to help and finding someone who would understand is even worse, no one will understand. Its gonna be how u deal with it lying down on the floor face first in the end. Im not the only one suffering in this kind of situations and i understand that there are alot worse cases then this ( neither am i saying it isnt serious ) but really i feel like slapping myself asking to wake up. People rarely regret being what they've become this early in life, and we are too young to look cool carrying our burdens around. I never wanted.. to carry a burden.. like this. I dont want to sound emotional, because its gay. But even though the road only goes in 1 direction, 1 day finished = 1 day nearer to death, its really going to end like a dream, when the sand runs through the hour glass to the last grain. i regret, i really.. really do. |